The blink of an eye, a whole new era, always. It's funny how the past year has gone in a flash, but anything before it seems a lifetime ago. Next week our son will turn one. We have all grown so much - he has grown from a hopeful dream, a speck under a microscope, a moving miracle on a scan screen, a tiny, sweet newborn, to a beautiful, clever toddler.
We have grown too, into Mothers, adapting to this whole new world that motherhood has brought.
We remember May 2016 so clearly - it was scorching hot, Lauren had spent the first part of May in hospital with pre eclampsia, and I used to get a short local train ride to the hospital every day after work, holding a cold drink, carrying a gift for her - magazines, nice flip flops, pyjamas. Sometimes she would sit under one of the many blossom trees and wait for me, and now blossom always reminds us of that strangely happy time!
Then she came out of hospital, and we had an amazing couple of weeks; our Tiffany & Co themed baby shower, the sight of tiny baby grows hung on the washing line, our favourite music playing constantly for us and the bump, decorating his sky themed nursery in grey and white with our friends and family, the constant sunshine, waiting for the rose bush we had planted when we started ivf to bloom, the peace, the happiness, the excitement.
His birth story, told here, was the creation of us as Mothers, as much as our sons arrival into the world.
Is it what we thought it would be? A definite no! We completely underestimated how exhausted broken sleep makes you, how time to yourself or as a couple becomes a rare luxury, how it completely takes over your life, and how it's more wonderful than words could ever, ever describe. We have become experts in multi tasking, and have learned to make the most of what little 'me time' or time as a couple we have. We have learned what's important, to let the little things go, learned to put someone other than ourselves first, making every parenting choice based on what's the very best for him. We have learnt a new kind of love, and with it our hearts became even fuller.
And Oskar? He now looks like a little boy, not a baby. He has big, bright blue, long lash framed eyes that strangers stop to comment on. He has wisps of wavy hair that look like spun gold - glinting copper in some lights and white blonde in others. Apart from each other, he is the most beautiful thing we have ever laid eyes on; we could stare at him for hours. And we do. He has the most adorable smile that lights up his features.
And the giggles - it sounds strange to say this about a baby, but he has an amazing sense of humour! From sudden, squealing peals of laughter, to a cheeky smile starting to spread across his features when you catch his eye. He is such a happy boy, and loves to laugh, and see others laugh.
Movement wise he is less interested, and isn't crawling or walking - but can turn himself 360 and shuffle himself across a room!
His fine motor skills are the level of an 18 month old; scribbling with crayons, threading cotton through holes, picking up individual peas, turning pages of a book, clapping, throwing, pointing.
His favourite things right now haven't changed from when he was tiny, just his abilities and the way he enjoys them have.
He adores singing and music - he will stop playing and watch intently if a live music performance is on tv, and joins in when people applaud - we think he has a career on the stage!
He also loves musical instruments, and sorting things from one pile to another is his favourite game.
We are lucky that baths are another favourite, hopefully this long continues!
So on Sunday 4th June, our baby is a baby no more, but officially a toddler. This day is bittersweet for us; on the one hand we are so sad to say goodbye to the days of him being a tiny scrunched up baby. There are so many little things he does, that we do, that will one day be the last time we do them. But on the other hand we are so proud of the boy he has become, that he is becoming.
The first year of his life has given us countless memories more beautiful than we could ever have imagined. Those memories are some of our most cherished possessions, and although its a little sad to say goodbye to our firstborns babyhood, the excitement of the memories we are yet to create is magical.